Déjà Vu

It’s been a week now since I started back at college, I'm repeating my second year in a History and Philosophy and it has so far been a strange experience. It’s good to be back and for me so much feels familiar, except perhaps the people I study with. One thing I have noticed though is while I think this is Déjà Vu, the collage is seeing as reset.

This is causing a number of issues for me I have to deal with.

It’s amazing how much of this year is similar to last year, I'm starting college again broke again, it’s funny and at the same time it’s really not, it seems that at the start of the year until grants come in it collage just drains your pocket like it has a black hole in, I know students are meant to be skint but I'm afraid I'm well beyond that classification now. I'm also starting collage with someone on my mind, I think each year there is someone on my mind, and as normal it’s a girl, as normal it's some sort of situation I would like to resolve. So I day dream about it in my lectures, really it’s a habit I’ve got to get out of, but as a hopeless romantic I really cannot.

Another issue that has landed on my lap is a choice, a choice as to what I do next year, it’s been pointed out to me that I might not get the exemption from the co-op year, this for me is a pain in the backside as I really did not want to stretch this degree out. Choices are work or overseas college placement (instead of just doing my final year). This is a result of lousy work experience in sales and insurance that might not be relevant to my course, well it’s not, I agree with that, So I have had to look at options, do I apply and hope for the best, or go off an teach for the year, I also have the option of my first two choices last year which where Melbourne in Australia and Aarhus in Denmark. I can also decide to change my option and study in America for a year, ok for people who have got to know me recently that is like dangling a carrot in front of a donkey, the carrot was coated in maple syrup when a college in Chicago came up, (personally i think its a cruel trick) all this amounts to me going “oh no not again” well it’s time to make the choice and once again i ask myself  "what will I do"?

I was in the placement seminar when I was thinking all this, I don’t think I heard a word that was said, I was away in another world when suddenly the girl in front was scowling at me, I was kicking her chair not realising I was doing it, she had red hair and dark green (I think) shorts just below the knee, she reminded me of someone I once knew, so I shrugged at her and when back to wondering what my choices are, while jumping up and down on her phone while she was trying to text (in my head)

Really I do need to focus more